Hello Mama and welcome to the You’ve Got This Mama Podcast, season 2. What a year, amirite? But we survived it and here we are in 2021, new year, new vision, new perspective.
We took a short hiatus from the podcast (you’ve probably noticed that we’ve been away from it for a while) with intention of course. 2020 was a year for turning inward, a year for reflection, assessing where we needed to make some massive changes, and it’s also been a year of incredible growth. And so we’re back—more aligned, more intentional than ever, and more spaciousness, because that is where everything thrives.
Today’s episode talks about New Year’s Intentions vs Resolutions. You’re likely wondering… huh? How is that any different? Well, Mama, it is. I talked about this a couple weeks ago on Global News and, you know, it's such a huge point, right now, especially with what's going on in the world, hi second round of lockdowns, we are feeling you! In some places, you know schools being closed down, forcing parents to pivot to homeschooling again. So the same scenario repeats itself again, but the difference this time around will be our intentions around it, around fusing our lives together and still maintaining our personal space, our mental, emotional, and physical health and wellbeing. Here’s the thing, statistics show that 80% of people give up on their “resolutions” by January 17th to be exact, which is why it’s now been coined Goodbye New Year’s Resolutions day!
Have you ever wondered why we do that? Why do we go back on them? Why do we say something only to self-sabotage our efforts that we deep dive into on January 1st? And most of all, why wait until the new year to kickstart a new hobby, work on our health / business / insert whatever you are working on?
Wanna know a secret? Lean in a bit closer, it’s because resolutions set us up for failure. The hard expectations we place on ourselves with no wiggle room for being human, is what sets us up to self sabotage and ultimately fail and give up our habits. And I don’t want that for you, especially with all of the added stressors and things that we have going on right now.
So as you listen to this episode, I want you to keep an open mind and heart as you unlearn everything you’ve learned. Yes, I still love big goals, big visions, dream board parties even, nothing wrong with that! But be compassionate with yourself, go easy on yourself as you take on new habits, new patterns, and implement any sort of change in your life. Resolutions are rigid and to me, they focus on short term growth whereas intentions are softer, more human, and focus on long term change and growth. Resolutions focus on external rewards, for instance, I want to lose 10 pounds in 30 days, and then I will reward myself with a trip to the spa. I know, you’ve heard, “Be very specific, do this, do that.” But when you assign a number to something it can set you up for failure, especially if it's not a realistic number. So, yes, losing 10 pounds is absolutely possible. But wouldn't it be more heartwarming to say, I want to feel healthier. I want to feel more energetic. I want to get better. I want to drink more water, I want to eat more nourishing foods, I want to sleep a bit longer (which might mean going to bed a bit earlier each night at a consistent time) etc. Keeping this example in mind, how about we focus on what it takes to actually lose the 10 pounds? How about we become more intentional with what we consume, our daily habits instead of only focusing on a particular number on the scale? And those intentions can be broken into small steps that we use as building blocks… or as the greats call it, habit stacking. This is something that I've sort of catered to my own life and change around so that it works for me and my family.
An example could be my cup of coffee each morning. We all know coffee on an empty stomach or too much coffee can be acidic in our body. So habit stacking can mean having a glass of warm lemon water in the morning prior to having your cup of coffee (thank you to my dear friend Mona Sharma who introduced me to this). It’s that simple. Coffee now becomes my reward after I have my daily glass of lemon water.
You see, depriving ourselves of what we love to enjoy feels restrictive and going cold turkey doesn’t work for everyone. The solution? Stack healthy habits on both ends. For me, this means enjoying a healthy smoothie after my cup of coffee. That’s my ritual. Find your rituals and stack new, healthy habits around them, so it sets you up for success instead.
Focus on the journey, the growth, instead of the end destination. Like a GPS, you will have to reroute many times due to multiple factors that are sometimes beyond your control, but give yourself grace and compassion as you pivot, adapt, and work around things to reach your goals. Be flexible. Allow yourself to recalculate, know what your coordinates are (that is your big, hairy, scary, vision and goal), and anchor into it, but don’t be rigid as you work to get there. And sure you may get lost along the way, you may even veer off course for a bit, but allow yourself to ask for directions—you never know who you're going to meet on the way, you never know what lessons you're going to learn. And it's such a powerful exercise in discovering how resilient you are.
Instead of resolutions, write up commitments to yourself instead. Commitments will keep you accountable to your goals, promises, and intentions. Resolutions don’t have any sort of commitment behind them because we start it off with rigidity, full force in, our commitment starts to wane after a few weeks. Intentions however have commitment as their underlying energy. Commit to have at least 8 cups of water every day. Commit to moving your body for at least 20 minutes every day. Commit to sleeping earlier every night. Commit to reading at least 10 pages of a book you’ve been wanting to read. You get where I am going with this. Commit to how you want to feel. Commit to your WHY. Why do you want to feel a certain way? Why is it important to you? How will you feel along the way? Who do you want to be along the way? Anchor into that! That’s the secret sauce behind all the movers and shakers and people who experience massive growth and change. It’s really about setting intentions versus setting rigid resolution, and that's what this year is about. 2020 for many of us was a year of adapting, pivoting, adjusting, recalculating, and repeating it every single day. It doesn't look like 2021 is going to be that much different, which is why intentions matter now more than ever.
I know it can be hard, I know we are dealing with a ton of stress on every level, so you owe it to yourself to live your most intentional year yet! Know that we’ve got you, Mama! Tune into this podcast, connect with us whenever you need that extra inspiration, that dose of kind but tough love. This season we will be interviewing some incredible guest experts and sharing all sorts of tools and resources to help you truly understand that no matter where you are on your journey or what your GPS coordinates say, you’ve totally got this!
I hope you enjoyed listening to this episode as much as we enjoyed recording it!
Pay it forward to and share, share, share this episode and your takeaways on social media and tag us @ygtmama #youvegotthismamapodcast. Subscribe + Rate + Leave us a review as it helps get our message get in front of more incredible womxn who need this.
See you next week!